Denial

Last Sunday at church, I saw 3 different newborns. They were so tiny, so perfect. My heart melted. Then, all of a sudden I thought, OMG that's gonna be us before we know it. Holding a baby. I think this kid is going to come sooner than I want. I know he's coming. 5 weeks from today. There's a small part of me that's really getting excited about it. But, most of the time, I'm still trying to admit that I am, in fact, pregnant. I'm still trying to wrap my brain around the fact that we'll be a family of 6 soon. This pregnancy was just such a huge surprise that it's taken me this long to adjust and realize all of the changes ahead for our family. I think Kevin has been in denial, too, from his blog post last week. He has his own stuff going on, and didn't even mention it.

Last week, we found out that we have to have the baby in a different hospital. I've been in touch with this hospital, and, let's just say, I'm hoping to not have to stay there for the full time allotted after a c-section. The lady spent 10 minutes telling me how great this hospital is and that it is considered a small town hospital. Um...that's not really what I want to hear. She also said that the hospital was built in 1972 and was the first hospital in the state to have dads stay in the room with the mom and baby. Because of this, the rooms are quite small. In fact, after boasting about letting dads stay, she quickly said that they usually don't b/c of the small space. Great...And, because of the way the rooms are laid out, the showers are located down the hall. NOT in the hospital room. Are you kidding me? Is that even legal? I am suddenly dreading this delivery more and more with every thought. Never in a million years did I think that by having a baby in California, that I'd be stepping back in time...I am soooo not thrilled about this.

Just give me the percocept that I've been looking forward to getting and let me recover at home.