Friday, June 12, 2009

Rough week

Monday started off as a regular day. The older girls had camp and VBS. I was looking forward to having the mornings with just Presley.
Tuesday morning, my best friend, Rachel called. Things have been different ever since.
Early Thursday morning, Rachel delivered a stillborn baby. A boy. 10 fingers. 10 toes. Joshua Brian Bollinger.
  • I've learned some things this week. Life doesn't stop when crises hits. Kids still get hungry, get tired, get fussy.
  • Who are we to think, just b/c we're Christians, that we're immune to horrible circumstances. My dad painfully reminded me and Rachel that God the Father didn't even spare his son from pain when he was sent to the cross.
  • It's a humbling experience to except help. People don't like to ask for help. It's hard to let others serve you.
  • Just because it's "over" doesn't mean it's really over. I don't think it will ever be "over," this side of heaven.
Rachel's older kids have been hanging out with us this week. Ben, Avery, Lizzy and McKenna have had sooooo much fun together. Not one fight. Not one argument. Just fun. And probably too much sugar.
When we were going to camp this morning, I asked everyone what their favorite part of the week has been. Both Ben and Avery said swimming at camp. Both Kenna and Lizzy said the music at VBS(hint, they didn't swim :) When I asked Lizzy what her favorite song was, she said "I Get Down." That's McKenna's favorite too. What a song for this week. God's promises are true.

Lavishly our lives are wasted
Humbleness is left untasted
You can't live your life to please yourself, yeah
That's a tip from my mistakes
Exactly what it doesn't take
To win you've got to come in last place
To live your life you've got to lose it
And all the losers get a crown

I get down and he lifts me up
I get down and he lifts me up
I get down and he lifts me up
I get down

All I need's another day
Where I cant seem to get away
From the many things that drag me down, yeah
I'm sure you've had a day like me
Where nothing seems to set you free
From the burdens you can't carry all alone
In your weakness he is stronger
In your darkness he shines through
When you're crying he's your comfort
When your all alone, he's carrying you


This valley is so deep
I can barely see the sun
I cry out for mercy, lord
You lift me up again

1 comment:

Lissasings said...

I'm so sorry for your friend's loss...and for yours. Thirteen years ago in January, one of best friends gave birth to her first child, and she was stillborn. I still wrestle with why God allowed Jamie to carry that baby to term only to lose her. To this day, she still speaks of Christine...she's her baby, she just didn't get to have much time with her. I can tell you that she and her husband have come to a place of peace, and they know that they will one day hold her in heaven.
The loss of child is something that I'll never understand...I'll put it in my pocket and talk to God about it someday when I see Him face to face. The loss of our friend's child to cancer has been, quite possibly, the worst thing I've had to wrestle with...I spent some time with my back to him, so angry that he could have done this to a child...but God is working it all out for good. During the time of Kyrie's death there were two songs that spoke to me...I'm sure you've heard them. However, I'll post the links here for you.

You and your friend will be in my in knowing that her angel baby is in the arms of the Almighty.
My favorite lyric from this song is "When I cross over Jordan, I'm gonna sing, I'm gonna shout...I'm gonna look into your eyes and see You NEVER let me down..."

Love in Christ,