Wednesday, December 17, 2008

There's no place like home

I came across a new blog today, and I loved this post. I've worked outside the home off and on since Avery was born almost 6 years ago. I didn't realize that I wanted to be a stay at home mom until I actually had a baby. I just assumed I'd stay home on maternity leave, then go back to work. No conflicting thoughts or feelings. It would just happen. Boy, I was soo wrong. My heart ached when I went back to work. I remember pleading with Kevin after coming home from the hospital after Avery was born to let me not go back to work. I was teaching at the time and knew I couldn't legally just quit. And we couldn't live on Kevin's income at the time. Having to work outside the home was very hard for me. I would get depressed. I would be jealous of other moms who stayed at home. I was bitter. I had a good work ethic, I liked work, once I got there. I just didn't want to leave my baby. My heart was home. I felt called to be in the home. Kevin got this book, which confirmed by feelings. In 2007, Kevin was offered a position that allowed me to stay home. These last 2 years have been the best. I LOVE being home. Granted, I work 1 day a week during the college semester. Even working 1 day a week is hard most weeks. This position provides a cushion and some extra money for us. There have been many times when I want to quit. In my head, I feel I've been offered a great job, and I don't want to let it go. This job gives my kids a chance to spend the day with grandparents. But is it right during this season, while I have little ones at home? I still consider myself a SAHM. I thank God for the opportunity to be a wife and mom. I don't want to take this for granted. Ok, long rambling thoughts. Scroll back up and click on the link that started this post.

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